٤٠ - باب بر الوالدين وصلة الأرحام

On the authority of Abū ʿAbd al-Raḥmān ʿAbd Allāh ibn Masʿūd (may Allah be pleased with him), who said: I asked the Prophet (ﷺ): “Which deed is most beloved to Allah, Most High?” He said: “Prayer at its [appointed] time.” I said: “Then which?” He said: “Dutifulness to one’s parents.” I said: “Then which?” He said: “Jihad in the path of Allah.” Agreed upon.

On the authority of Abū Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased with him), who said: The Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said: “A child cannot repay his parent, unless he finds him a slave, then buys him and sets him free.” Narrated by Muslim.

On the same authority (may Allah be pleased with him): that the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said: “Whoever believes in Allah and the Last Day, let him honour his guest; and whoever believes in Allah and the Last Day, let him maintain his ties of kinship; and whoever believes in Allah and the Last Day, let him say something good or remain silent.” Agreed upon.

On his authority, who said: The Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said: “Allah, Most High, created creation, and when He had finished [creating] them, the womb [the bond of kinship] arose and said: This is the station of one seeking refuge in You from being severed. He said: Yes; are you not content that I keep connected whoever keeps you connected, and sever whoever severs you? It said: Indeed. He said: Then that is yours.” Then the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said: “Recite, if you wish: {So would you perhaps, if you turned away, cause corruption in the land and sever your ties of kinship? Those are the ones whom Allah has cursed, so He made them deaf and blinded their sight} [Muḥammad: 22–23].” Agreed upon. In a narration of al-Bukhārī: So Allah, Most High, said: “Whoever keeps you connected, I keep him connected, and whoever severs you, I sever him.”

On his authority (may Allah be pleased with him), who said: A man came to the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) and said: “O Messenger of Allah, who among people is most deserving of my good companionship?” He said: “Your mother.” He said: “Then who?” He said: “Your mother.” He said: “Then who?” He said: “Your mother.” He said: “Then who?” He said: “Your father.” Agreed upon. In another narration: “O Messenger of Allah, who is most deserving of good companionship?” He said: “Your mother, then your mother, then your mother, then your father, then your nearest relative, then your nearest relative.” [Al-Nawawī notes:] “al-Ṣaḥābah” here carries the sense of “companionship” (al-ṣuḥbah). As for his words “then your father (abāka)” — thus it is in the accusative, governed by an omitted verb, that is: “then be dutiful to your father.” And in another narration: “then your father (abūka),” and this is clear.

On his authority, from the Prophet (ﷺ), who said: “May his nose be rubbed in the dust, then may his nose be rubbed in the dust, then may his nose be rubbed in the dust — [namely] whoever reaches his parents in their old age, one of them or both, and does not [thereby] enter Paradise.” Narrated by Muslim.

And on his authority (may Allah be pleased with him): A man said, “O Messenger of Allah, I have relatives whom I keep ties with while they cut me off; I am good to them while they mistreat me; and I am forbearing towards them while they behave ignorantly towards me.” He said, “If you are as you say, then it is as though you are feeding them hot ashes, and you will not cease to have a supporter from Allah against them so long as you remain upon that.” Narrated by Muslim. “Wa-tusiffuhum” is with a ḍammah on the tāʾ, a kasrah on the unpointed sīn, and a shaddah on the fāʾ; “al-mall” is with a fatḥah on the mīm and a shaddah on the lām, and it means hot ashes — that is, it is as though you are feeding them hot ashes. It is a likening of the sin that befalls them to the pain that befalls one who eats hot ashes. There is no blame upon this one who is good to them; rather, a grave sin befalls them for falling short in his right and for inflicting harm upon him. And Allah knows best.

And from Anas (may Allah be pleased with him): that the Messenger of Allah ﷺ said, “Whoever would love for his provision to be expanded for him and his term of life to be extended for him, let him maintain his kinship ties.” Agreed upon. The meaning of “his term extended for him in his trace” is: that his appointed time and lifespan be deferred for him.

And from him (Anas), who said: Abū Ṭalḥah was the wealthiest of the Anṣār in Medina in palm-groves, and the most beloved of his properties to him was Bayruḥāʾ, which faced the mosque. The Messenger of Allah ﷺ used to enter it and drink from its sweet water. When this verse was revealed: «You will never attain righteousness until you spend from that which you love» [Āl ʽImrān: 92], Abū Ṭalḥah rose and went to the Messenger of Allah ﷺ and said, “O Messenger of Allah, Allah, Mighty and Majestic, says: «You will never attain righteousness until you spend from that which you love», and the most beloved of my property to me is Bayruḥāʾ; it is a charity for Allah the Exalted, by which I hope for its righteousness and its stored reward with Allah the Exalted. So place it, O Messenger of Allah, wherever Allah shows you.” The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said, “Bakh! That is profitable property, that is profitable property! I have heard what you said, and I consider that you should give it to your near relatives.” Abū Ṭalḥah said, “I shall do so, O Messenger of Allah.” So Abū Ṭalḥah divided it among his relatives and his cousins. Agreed upon. An explanation of its wording has already preceded in the Chapter on Spending from what one loves.

And from ʽAbd Allāh ibn ʽAmr ibn al-ʽĀṣ (may Allah be pleased with them both), who said: A man came to the Prophet of Allah ﷺ and said, “I pledge allegiance to you upon emigration and struggle (jihād), seeking the reward from Allah the Exalted.” He said, “Is either of your parents alive?” He said, “Yes, indeed both of them.” He said, “And you seek the reward from Allah the Exalted?” He said, “Yes.” He said, “Then go back to your parents and keep good company with them.” Agreed upon, and this is the wording of Muslim. In a narration of both of them: A man came and asked his permission to take part in jihād, so he said, “Are your parents alive?” He said, “Yes.” He said, “Then strive in (serving) them.”

And from him, from the Prophet ﷺ, who said: “The one who maintains ties is not the one who merely reciprocates; rather, the one who maintains ties is he who, when his kinship is cut off, restores it.” Narrated by al-Bukhārī. “Qaṭaʽat” is with a fatḥah on the qāf and the ṭāʾ; and “raḥimuhu” is in the nominative case.

And from ʽĀʾishah (may Allah be pleased with her), who said: The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said, “The womb of kinship is suspended from the Throne, saying: Whoever maintains me, Allah maintains him; and whoever cuts me off, Allah cuts him off.” Agreed upon.

And from the Mother of the Believers, Maymūnah bint al-Ḥārith (may Allah be pleased with her): that she freed a slave-girl without asking permission of the Prophet ﷺ. Then, on the day when it was her turn for him to be with her, she said, “Are you aware, O Messenger of Allah, that I have freed my slave-girl?” He said, “Have you done so?” She said, “Yes.” He said, “Truly, had you given her to your maternal uncles, it would have been greater in reward for you.” Agreed upon.

And from Asmāʾ bint Abī Bakr al-Ṣiddīq (may Allah be pleased with them both), who said: My mother came to me, while she was a polytheist, during the time of the Messenger of Allah ﷺ. So I sought a ruling from the Messenger of Allah ﷺ; I said, “My mother has come to me and she is desirous (of my kindness); shall I maintain ties with my mother?” He said, “Yes, maintain ties with your mother.” Agreed upon. Her saying “desirous” means: longing, hoping for something from me, asking me for something. It has been said that her mother was a blood-relation, and it has been said by way of suckling (a foster-relation); and the correct view is the former.

And from Zaynab al-Thaqafiyyah, the wife of ʽAbd Allāh ibn Masʽūd (may Allah be pleased with them both), and on her authority, who said: The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said, “Give in charity, O company of women, even from your jewellery.” She said: So I returned to ʽAbd Allāh ibn Masʽūd and said to him, “You are a man of little means, and the Messenger of Allah ﷺ has commanded us to give charity, so go to him and ask him: if that suffices for me [I shall give it to you], and if not, I shall direct it to someone other than you.” ʽAbd Allāh said, “Rather, you go to him yourself.” So I set off, and there was a woman of the Anṣār at the door of the Messenger of Allah ﷺ; my need was her need. The Messenger of Allah ﷺ had been invested with an air of awe. Bilāl came out to us, and we said to him, “Go to the Messenger of Allah ﷺ and inform him that two women are at the door asking you: does charity given to their husbands and to orphans in their care suffice for them? — but do not tell him who we are.” Bilāl went in to the Messenger of Allah ﷺ and asked him, and the Messenger of Allah ﷺ said to him, “Who are they?” He said, “A woman of the Anṣār, and Zaynab.” The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said, “Which of the Zaynabs is she?” He said, “The wife of ʽAbd Allāh.” The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said, “For them there are two rewards: the reward of kinship and the reward of charity.” Agreed upon.

And from Abū Sufyān Ṣakhr ibn Ḥarb (may Allah be pleased with him), in his lengthy hadith concerning the story of Heraclius: that Heraclius said to Abū Sufyān, “What then does he command you to do?” — meaning the Prophet ﷺ. He said: I replied, “He says: Worship Allah alone and associate nothing with Him, and abandon what your forefathers say; and he commands us with prayer, truthfulness, chastity, and maintaining kinship ties.” Agreed upon.

And from Abū Dharr (may Allah be pleased with him), who said: The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said, “You will conquer a land in which the qīrāṭ is mentioned.” In another narration: “You will conquer Egypt, which is a land where the qīrāṭ is named, so treat its people well, for they have a covenant (of protection) and a kinship.” In another narration: “When you conquer it, be good to its people, for they have a covenant and a kinship,” or he said, “a covenant and a marriage-bond.” Narrated by Muslim. The scholars said: “The kinship” which they have is that Hājar, the mother of Ismāʽīl (peace be upon him), was from among them; and “the marriage-bond” is that Māriyah, the mother of Ibrāhīm the son of the Messenger of Allah ﷺ, was from among them.

And from Abū Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased with him), who said: When this verse was revealed — «And warn your nearest kinsfolk» [al-Shuʽarāʾ: 214] — the Messenger of Allah ﷺ called Quraysh, and they gathered. He addressed them both generally and specifically, and said, “O Banū ʽAbd Shams, O Banū Kaʽb ibn Luʾayy, save yourselves from the Fire! O Banū Murrah ibn Kaʽb, save yourselves from the Fire! O Banū ʽAbd Manāf, save yourselves from the Fire! O Banū Hāshim, save yourselves from the Fire! O Banū ʽAbd al-Muṭṭalib, save yourselves from the Fire! O Fāṭimah, save yourself from the Fire! For I possess nothing for you against Allah, except that you have a kinship which I shall moisten with its due moisture (i.e. keep with its proper ties).” Narrated by Muslim. His saying ﷺ “bi-bilālihā”: it is read with a fatḥah on the second bāʾ, and also with a kasrah; and “al-bilāl” means water. The meaning of the hadith is: “I shall maintain it”; he likened the severing of it to heat that is extinguished by water, and this [kinship] is cooled by maintaining ties.

On the authority of Abū ʿAbdullāh ʿAmr ibn al-ʿĀṣ (may Allah be pleased with them both), who said: I heard the Messenger of Allah ﷺ say openly, not in secret: “The family of so-and-so are not my allies; my ally is only Allah and the righteous among the believers. But they do have ties of kinship which I keep moist with their due moistening [i.e. which I maintain by treating them well].” Agreed upon, and the wording is al-Bukhārī’s.

On the authority of Abū Ayyūb Khālid ibn Zayd al-Anṣārī (may Allah be pleased with him): a man said: “O Messenger of Allah, tell me of a deed that will admit me to Paradise and keep me far from the Fire.” The Prophet ﷺ said: “You worship Allah and associate nothing with Him, establish the prayer, give the zakāt, and maintain the ties of kinship.” Agreed upon.

On the authority of Salmān ibn ʿĀmir (may Allah be pleased with him), from the Prophet ﷺ, who said: “When one of you breaks his fast, let him break it with dates, for they are a blessing; and if he does not find dates, then with water, for it is purifying.” And he said: “Charity to the needy is charity [alone], but to a relative it is two things: charity and the maintaining of kinship.” Narrated by al-Tirmidhī, who said: “A good (ḥasan) hadith.”

On the authority of Ibn ʿUmar (may Allah be pleased with them both), who said: I had a wife whom I loved, but ʿUmar disliked her, and he said to me: “Divorce her,” but I refused. So ʿUmar (may Allah be pleased with him) went to the Prophet ﷺ and mentioned that to him, and the Prophet ﷺ said: “Divorce her.” Narrated by Abū Dāwūd and al-Tirmidhī, who said: “A good and sound (ḥasan ṣaḥīḥ) hadith.”

On the authority of Abū al-Dardāʾ (may Allah be pleased with him): a man came to him and said: “I have a wife, and my mother orders me to divorce her.” He replied: I heard the Messenger of Allah ﷺ say: “The parent is the middle gate of Paradise; so if you wish, forfeit that gate, or preserve it.” Narrated by al-Tirmidhī, who said: “A good and sound (ḥasan ṣaḥīḥ) hadith.”

On the authority of al-Barāʾ ibn ʿĀzib (may Allah be pleased with them both), from the Prophet ﷺ, who said: “The maternal aunt holds the rank of the mother.” Narrated by al-Tirmidhī, who said: “A good and sound (ḥasan ṣaḥīḥ) hadith.” On this topic there are many well-known hadiths in the authentic collection; among them is the hadith of the people of the cave and the hadith of Jurayj, both of which have already preceded, and well-known hadiths in the authentic collection which I have omitted for brevity. Among the most important of them is the long hadith of ʿAmr ibn ʿAbasa (may Allah be pleased with him), which comprises many statements on the principles of Islam and its manners, and which I shall mention in full, if Allah the Exalted wills, in the Chapter on Hope. In it he said: I came to the Prophet ﷺ in Mecca — meaning at the beginning of his prophethood — and said to him: “What are you?” He said: “A prophet.” I said: “And what is a prophet?” He said: “Allah the Exalted has sent me.” I said: “With what has He sent you?” He said: “He has sent me with the maintaining of kinship ties, the breaking of idols, and that Allah be declared one, nothing being associated with Him...” and he mentioned the rest of the hadith. And Allah knows best.